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Distorted Self Image is a real thing...

Updated: Apr 21, 2022

Distorted Self Image is a real thing! Not all pretty woman believe they are pretty.

How is it that you can take a picture of yourself with no make-up or filters and say to, that's a pretty picture, but cannot bring yourself to identify with the picture enough to say "wow, I''M PRETTY"?

I remember back in the 90's in the Janet Jackson Era when I heard her say during a Interview that she didn't see herself as beautiful as the world saw her. That she felt unattractive to say the least

That blew me away because I always thought she was super pretty, even without makeup.

But what was more surprising is that someone else felt how I felt. You see all my life I was told that I was pretty, but I never believed or accepted it. Now I knew I wasn't hideous but "pretty" was pushing it In my opinion. At best, I thought I was cute...but only when I was dressed up & had a room full of DOM's drooling after me and I even charged that to the confidence I faked.

I hid it well from everyone I knew.

That poor perception of self lead to a slew of problems from eating disorders to lots of poor choices. It affected almost every area of my life because I couldn't see past this poor self-image.

It took years of self-development and spiritual empowerment for me to finally arrive at a place of self-acceptance but only on the hypothesis that the beauty I see in those pictures is the real me.

It wasn't until then that I came to terms with myself and the journey ahead warranted a reversal of the physical and psychological damage that 40yrs of living as an imposter to myself has created.

Having the ability to fake the confidence of a beautiful worthy woman allowed me to push through obstacles and create a life I can be comfortable with.

But now that the veil is off, and the opportunity to create a life that I can be in love with came into view, I had to destroy all those old patterns & barriers that kept me from living full out and I had to develop a whole new set of tools to build a foundation for the beautiful woman I stand face to face with today.

Keeping the old me buried can be a struggle at times because there are obstacles that present themselves on occasions that are attached to the emotional triggers that created this false sense of self, to begin with, but my desire to be authentic and serve within my purpose from a genuine place overrides that distortion and liberates me every day!

I don't know who needed to hear this but I was driven to express it.

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